I grew up in a neighborhood on Chicago’s South Side
My life planned out for me: find a husband, be a bride
Then become a mother, have a kid or two or three
But changing dirty diapers - man, that wasn’t me
Not a word about college was spoken in our home
My father, the patriarch, ruled from his throne
I was stubborn and opinionated, much to his chagrin
And when we had an argument, I always fought to win
I was a Latina: I should learn to iron, sew and cook
And if I learned all that, then maybe I could read a book
He just didn’t understand the struggle in my heart
He just couldn’t see that our ideas were worlds apart
And even though I loved him, I began to rebel
The more he tried to silence me, the louder I would yell
The world beyond our home loudly called my name
A world where violence ruled and your brutality gained you fame
I was completely fascinated by the chaos of the street
I learned when to stay and fight and when I should retreat
The leader of the gang tried to keep me from harm’s way
He’d ask for my report card, shake his head, and say:
“You’re too smart to stay here; your grades are really good
Mija, go to college. You gotta leave the ‘hood.
Don’t pretend that you’re not smart just to please some stupid guy
You gotta get away from here. Tell me that you’ll try.”
But I just wouldn’t listen, I was stubborn as a mule
And middle of my Senior year, I said good-bye to school
Still he tried to tell me that I had no future there
But by then I’d seen such ugly things that I just didn’t care
So he told his boys to respect me, to watch over me all the time
And even though I didn’t like it, the decision wasn’t mine
One after another, my friends were getting killed
Another funeral to attend, another coffin filled
I was out there doing things that could have gotten me shot
And my poor Mami worried, cried, and prayed a lot
There were many situations I didn’t think I’d survive
But my Mami must have said a rosary, ‘cause Baby, I’m alive
And he kept trying to protect me even when he went to jail
He’d advise me when I visited, sent me letters in the mail
Eventually I left the neighborhood and ended up out here
I wanted to make a difference; I wanted a career
I ended up at Shoreline, a school that I adore
Everyone’s been so supportive, I couldn’t ask for more
The people here at Shoreline have played a vital role
And it’s because of all their help that I’ve achieved my goal
In the Fall I’ll be majoring in Sociology at Seattle U.
I never thought I’d get this far, it’s like a dream come true
My dream is to work with troubled youth who need someone to care
And because it’s so important, there’s a lesson I will share:
It’s not all about you, hard to believe, I know!
But every decision that you make will eventually come to show
That every action affects someone in a positive or negative way
So please be conscious of what you do each and every day
And because of who he was, I can’t say his name out loud
But if he could see and hear me now, I know I’ve made him proud.
Copyright, Angela Carranza